Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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