Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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