So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
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