how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Randomize
