need another drink. this is the easiest way
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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