Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
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