Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I just threw up on my dentist

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  (603): I just threw up on my dentist http://tfl.nu/4tee
  Replies (20) Good night (886) Bad night (3203)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?

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  (516): she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe? http://tfl.nu/rh9d
  Replies (25) Good night (1140) Bad night (4701)
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself

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  (253): I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself http://tfl.nu/cpen
  Replies (21) Good night (4469) Bad night (829)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"

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  (954): I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies" http://tfl.nu/cnee
  Replies (16) Good night (4943) Bad night (1240)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  I wish they made helmets for livers.

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  (262): I wish they made helmets for livers. http://tfl.nu/bj92
  Replies (12) Good night (5645) Bad night (807)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.

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  (713): yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn. http://tfl.nu/bp9j
  Replies (38) Good night (4821) Bad night (2092)
• Favorite

  (434): View more from Virginia

  The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever

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  (434): The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever http://tfl.nu/goyi
  Replies (22) Good night (7677) Bad night (1159)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention

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  (845): Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention http://tfl.nu/alzz
  Replies (9) Good night (4198) Bad night (1206)
• Favorite

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.

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  (306): I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not. http://tfl.nu/ytdq
  Replies (5) Good night (3635) Bad night (965)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.

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  (803): i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to. http://tfl.nu/ojj7
  Replies (10) Good night (824) Bad night (4022)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.

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  (513): They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real. http://tfl.nu/3nu3
  Replies (32) Good night (2262) Bad night (6403)
• Favorite

  (915): View more from Texas

  Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.

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  (915): Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand. http://tfl.nu/jhm4
  Replies (4) Good night (1091) Bad night (513)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.

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  (214): You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted. http://tfl.nu/igqi
  Replies (7) Good night (2265) Bad night (450)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.

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  (202): I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control. http://tfl.nu/1mo8
  Replies (0) Good night (826) Bad night (212)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all

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  (503): multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all http://tfl.nu/0tag
  Replies (0) Good night (417) Bad night (270)

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