Texts From Last Night

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  (276): View more from Virginia

  Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face

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  (276): Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face http://tfl.nu/0y76
  Replies (7) Good night (4060) Bad night (886)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"

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  (440): I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!" http://tfl.nu/07u8
  Replies (21) Good night (6719) Bad night (908)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.

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  (602): I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door. http://tfl.nu/hvfb
  Replies (6) Good night (7197) Bad night (1010)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.

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  (419): Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night. http://tfl.nu/v4wy
  Replies (6) Good night (970) Bad night (2284)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?

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  (832): Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday? http://tfl.nu/ynw6
  Replies (16) Good night (4610) Bad night (1517)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though

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  (732): Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though http://tfl.nu/qwoj
  Replies (4) Good night (905) Bad night (1552)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.

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  (214): One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair. http://tfl.nu/h2x0
  Replies (5) Good night (2765) Bad night (1013)
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.

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  (604): He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there. http://tfl.nu/lavl
  Replies (10) Good night (2077) Bad night (658)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat

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  (917): I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat http://tfl.nu/jkqr
  Replies (2) Good night (1073) Bad night (629)
• Favorite

  (347): View more from New York

  I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?

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  (347): I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night? http://tfl.nu/sddm
  Replies (17) Good night (659) Bad night (1690)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.

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  (330): Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson. http://tfl.nu/3wwn
  Replies (6) Good night (1297) Bad night (562)
• Favorite

  (209): View more from California

  Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!

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  (209): Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology! http://tfl.nu/c0oh
  Replies (5) Good night (1117) Bad night (337)
• Favorite

  (858): View more from California

  He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone

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  (858): He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone http://tfl.nu/52cs
  Replies (8) Good night (1223) Bad night (317)
• Favorite

  (323): View more from California

  VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.

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  (323): VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL. http://tfl.nu/sras
  Replies (1) Good night (269) Bad night (410)
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.

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  (216): I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time. http://tfl.nu/gxl7
  Replies (1) Good night (150) Bad night (168)

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