Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
