OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Randomize
