And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
why do cheetos always look like penises
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
