you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize