dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Walk of Shame today included voting.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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