I can tuck mytits in my pants
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
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