You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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