u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.