I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
