would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I need water and some morals
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
