i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
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