talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
So vagazzling was a success
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
