I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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