O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
