the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Randomize