remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Randomize