So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
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