I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize