Why are handjobs necessary in class?
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Randomize
