He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
