no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize