if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize