Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
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