Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Randomize
