I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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