your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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