Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
