There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Can you bring me the toilet please
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
