I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
