How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Randomize
