How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Randomize
