I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
