You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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