Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Will you blow on my dice?
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
Boobs are out for the taking
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
