The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Randomize