her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Randomize
