Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Randomize
