ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
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