kristin has been a bad kristin
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize