So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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