with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
Randomize
