he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Randomize
