And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
