Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize