They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
